I have found nursing to be one of the coolest experiences about motherhood. The fact that my body was able to carry this being to full term and is now able to fully nourish him, is a miracle. I was really anticipating nursing and couldn't wait for that skin on skin moment after birth to begin giving it a shot. I had this picture in my head where the room would light up and gold sparkles would fall in celebration of the moment we successfully nursed. This was not the case.
Wally has an overbite which made things difficult and apparently one of my nipples is weird? So yeah, it wasn't working right. It got to be so intense that I was actually scared of my child and would wince every time he was hungry. Being scared of something that small that you love that much is so confusing. When I tried to get some information from a my nursing book it says if nursing hurts then the latch is wrong. So I am thinking, shit! I am going through this pain and we aren't even doing it right?
I was sleep deprived, frustrated and depleted in every possible way (besides love, I was abundant with love) and had to figure this out. After seeing my two chapped nipples in the mirror, I decided to ask my mommy friends about their nursing experiences. I found our that each one of them has their own set of issues and all included the initial pain from nursing. Commiserating with other moms was both reassuring and empowering. Also, I know that I am not supposed to compare myself, but I did have a friend who got really bloody nipples which I managed to avoid so I was feeling positive.
It's been one week since the birth of Wallace and with the support of the ladies in my life, things are getting better. Nursing is getting more comfortable and Wallace and I are finding our groove.